Ryan...PLEASE for your safety...take note.

Honey, I am not sleeping well. Not well at all. I need sleep.

SO, when your alarm goes off at 6:20 in the morning and you snooze until 6:55 and then turn it off (7 minute snoozes on his clock) and go back to sleep it frustrates me. ESPECIALLY since my clock goes off at 7:00!

You know the snapping at you this morning? THAT'S WHY! When I asked if you could take a note to the mailbox and you just stared at me waiting for a "please"? Well, you didn't get one because:
A. because I am not your 3 year old son you are trying to teach to say it
B. I'M PREGNANT and you better be nice to me
C. YOU.WOKE.ME.UP earlier and I was sleeping good.

Grr. to you Ryan....GRR GRR!

I think you got the point this morning. I hope so. Also, when your alarm goes off so does the noise maker. So when you snooze? I hear Hagen breathing, Dapper licking his paws, you SNORING. NOT.COOL.

C

Scary moments but turned out OK

Ryan is turkey hunting with 2 good friends. He loves going...I don't mind him going...he doesn't go that often.

Hagen slept until 8:00 on Saturday morning and we spent the morning watching cartoons, eating muffins, and snuggling. I decided at 10:30 we would get dressed and go hang out in the backyard! I wanted to get some sun...sun always makes you feel better about yourself.

BUT...for a moment my world stopped. I was spotting...VERY.LIGHT but still spotting none the less. I lost it. Hagen was wondering why I was crying. I told him I had an boo boo and that I would be fine. He told me to get a band aid and then was off doing whatever.

I called and talked to the doctor on call. He said with the violent stomach virus I had that I could have disrupted things. He said that if I am not cramping or bleeding alot then I was fine and to expect more for a few days to possibly appear.

My parents were concerned so they came to hang out. Dad watched the Masters while Hagen napped, I layed out in the sun and Mom hung out on the patio knitting the 1,000th hat/blanket for Emily that will be here in 2 weeks.

I got burned so bad! I will never learn that the first tan of the season is usually not a tan at all. I am fried! My parents took Hagen to their house while I stayed behind to get ready for the bachelorette party! Yes, I was attending a bachelorette party but mainly because they were going to Sambuca for dinner first and I wanted a nice dinner!

I had a great time and drank cranberry juice from a martini glass to feel "IN". Tell you what, I did alot of people watching! It has been so long since I have been out. It was nice to come home and not reek of smoke since you can not smoke in clubs anymore. There was a moment when the girls were touching my belly...it is truly my belly...not baby...it is only 9 weeks. I was catching myself trying to flex or something! One girl told me that I was cute and that you can hardly tell I was prego from behind. Well I hope so? And what do you mean by hardly? My backside did get quite wide with Hagen! That is the first that grew I swear! When I was leaving and walking out by myself I caught myself pushing my belly out as far as I could...why? I'm not sure...I still don't understand the logic. Whatever...

I got home around 10:30 and my parents said that Hagen was very good and that he wanted me to wake him up and tell him I was home and give him a kiss. He was so cute and sweet and told me he loved me and rolled back over and fell back asleep. It was his first time to sleep at Papa and Pia's house in a bed with rails! No more crib for Hagen!

He saw a picture of me and my brothers when we were little. My mom pointed me out and then when she pointed out Uncle Adam he said, "No, that's Hagen".

My brother was such a sweetie. You see, when Ryan is out of town I can not spend the night at my parents house (which is my favorite thing in the world) because of Dapper. He is a big dog, sheds, and they have cats so it is not a good combo. Since yesterday was rough, my parents talked to Adam about coming over the let Dapper out before bed and then in the morning when he woke up he came back and fed him and let him out again. Spending the night at my parents is so nice...Dad waits on us hand and foot and it is just nice.

I do have a funny Hagenism: This morning Papa went out to Dunkin Donuts and got us a donut. Hagen wanted a blue one (Dad looked at me like what? I told him to get one with sprinkles on it). Well, I guess Hagen has never had a big donut...just the little Hostess ones. He eats it so cute! He puts his thumb up through the hole and eats around it. It was the cutest thing of him sitting on a blanket in front of the TV watching Sesame Street eating a donut off his thumb.

Daddy's home...dinner is prepared to go in the crock pot for tomorrow night...my boys are in the shower...I'm lazy as I have EVER BEEN...life is good. I "made" dinner tonight...it was called Subway. It's weird with this pregnancy I'm not tired like I was with Hagen, but I am just SO.LAZY! I don't want to do anything!

Tata,
Carrie

SO glad this week is over!

I was such a drama queen this week!

The Blood Sugar thing on Tuesday MAY have been a migraine. Mom was talking with a friend and she was describing her migraine and it involved blinking vision and numbness. I wonder if it was? To be honest I had a headache but nothing that sounded like a migraine. I thought those were like where you can not even stand the headache!?

I will be talking with the doctor about that. It would be nice if it was because I could not for the life of me regulate my sugars.

So I finally started feeling better, met Rebecca and Noah at the park so the boys could play and then we went for frozen yogurt. It was a nice evening! THEN I woke up at 3AM...with the stomach bug...VERY BAD! Ryan was out of town so I had to get Hagen up and ready for school, drive him there and I called from the parking lot for a teacher to come get him. I felt SO BAD for SAHM's that have no outlet when they get slapped with the stomach bug! I couldn't keep a saltine down! I was miserable. Thank the lord Ryan was coming home that day so he got Hagen and was single Dad for the evening. Hagen and Ryan got me a card that sang "Hang on Sloopy..Sloopy hang on!" I was dying laughing! Ryan is so good at buying cards. Hagen picked one out too that was singing the Darth Vader song.

I woke up on Thursday morning feeling so much better and so happy to be out of bed (plus the cleaning people were coming) and headed to work. I was there for about 30 minutes and left again. I was not well. I went to Mom's and crashed in the study.

I feel SO much better today! I dropped of food at Caroline's house. I may have a crush. She is the sweetest person and is just someone that you fall in love with upon meeting her. Since I was not feeling the best this week I picked up Fajitas from Pappasito's for her.

Ryan is turkey hunting this weekend so it is just little man and me. He is being SO sweet tonight! I wonder what he is scheming?! This is not normal. I mean, he just randomly told me he loved me. What are you planning my little demon?

************************************************

I was making Hagen easy mac (because I am a rocking mom) and he was sitting on the counter (and the safest Mom) and he had his foot by my belly....here is the conversation:
Hagen: "What's in there?"
Me: "In where?"
H: "your belly"
Me: "My ice tea"
H: "no, there's a baby in there."
Me: "Oh really?"
H: "a baby girl....named Emily"

I thought he was on to me. But I think he is just confused about baby Emily in Aunt Rebecca's belly. He may be catching on to what people are saying. I'm trying not to tell him until we find out what is in there...if he finds out sooner then that's OK too...

***********************************

Ryan and Hagen were in the attic the other night getting Ryan's hunting stuff out. They came downstairs and Ryan was talking to Hagen about how they had to get out of the attic because the attic monster comes out when it gets dark. I looked at Ryan like he was smoking crack! What the hell are you telling an almost 3 year old that stuff for?! He said that Hagen told him, "Mama said that the attic monster comes out at night."

My little story teller...

So I said, "Hagen, there is no such thing as monsters! Who told you that?"
"Pia"

SO now my Mom told him that. We called her and she said, "Hagen, I didn't tell you there are monsters in your attic?"
He said, "Yes you did" and then went on about his business.

Clever little boy...

******************************************

One last story. At Dinner last night Hagen was talking about all the different colors of jelly beans. He ate a few bites of his dinner and then said, "I need to go poo poo please!"

I guess thinking about the jelly beans made him want to go big potty because he will get a jelly bean. Man, I think I would poop on command if I was given candy every time!

Tata,
Carrie

symptoms continued

OK, so I slept like a champ last night and woke up feeling great! No morning sickness, no gagging while brushing teeth...weird huh?!

I ate my egg and drank milk and got in the car to take little man to school...and my vision was "off". You see, when I have spurts of low blood sugar (has only happened a handful of times) it usually starts with my peripheral vision doing a strobe light thing...blinking kinda. Other times I will be having a conversation and have no idea what something is. For example, while talking with my brother and his wife we were discussing grocery stores and they said Albertson's...I had NO idea what that was...it is a grocery store that I visit every so often. I knew that I needed OJ and it was low blood sugar.

So I dropped Hagen off and felt very odd driving and went to sonic...ordered my tea and OJ. Downed the OJ, ate a butterscotch candy (in the glove compartment for such occasions) and sat there for it to get better...it didn't. I drove to work anyway. Luckily I didn't have that busy of a day so it was OK. It would NOT go away and actually got worse...my left arm started going numb. I ate a piece of string cheese and some graham crackers around 10:30 for my AM snack and it seemed to get better. SO, I'm wondering if I had HIGH blood sugar?! I'm not sure.

I called the doctor and they told me to check my sugars 3 times a day and just keep track...they want it to be between 80-100. So I'll do that. They can't test for GD until I am 26 weeks or so.

I felt fine the rest of the day. Came home to crock pot chicken...SO lovely to come home to dinner in the CP!! Love it!

Ryan came home, ate with us, packed, and went back out. He had to go to Fort Worth for a meeting and then had to be there early tomorrow morning so he decided to get a hotel room.

Hagen and I met Noah and Aunt Rebecca at the park and then went to get yogurt...LVOE all the new yogurt places! My favorite is Raspberry mixed with Angel cake/Cheesecake/Vanilla...whatever...so yummy! Hagen's has a drop of yogurt and alot of Marshmallows...he doesn't eat the yogurt so I hardly get him any...plus marshmallows weigh nothing so it is cheaper!!

Tata,
Carrie

Hit.A.Wall...

I've been very surprised that in this pregnancy as I have had no symptoms. I'm not tired, nothing is really bothering me (except for the nasty ham yesterday), I feel fine, just a little puffy in the gut which is the progesterone and let's face it ladies...Mama wears tight pants and there was no room in them to begin with. Sad but true! I think that tight pants you look slimmer because it is squeezing it all in (and out the top so you wear a baggier top to camo that. OK, so whatever that rant was...I got really off track.

Well, I forgot to take my progesterone both times yesterday because I was just a scatter brain. I didn't sleep last night and kept thinking about how bad I felt not taking it...but not bad enough to lug my arse up to get it. SO when I did fall asleep (I swear that one time) I dreamt that I miscarried...it was graphic and so sad...so very very sad. I didn't sleep very much...I felt crampy...just not right. Then I started to feel sick...kinda like you drank too much and you have the spins and need to put your foot on the ground while laying in bed to make sure you are not in fact spinning.

I have a horrible headache, am sick at my stomach, and so tired today! I was gagging brushing my teeth...I never got sick but man...it was a show.

I gagged down a hard boiled egg this morning and then felt sick when I looked at the yolk...visions of my baby bird on the porch surfaced...it was just not good.

I know this is SO.WHINEY but I just feel so sorry for myself. I thought I was in the clear, but man...this blows.

BUT, I will say that I would take this to get a perfect little Darney added to our family...it will be worth it...

Ryan is a saint. I'm sure of it. I have never heard him raise his voice.EVER. He is the calmest person I know. Not sure how I scored him to be honest. You know on the inside he is just rolling his eyes at my whining, but he is so considerate. You see, on Saturday I could have gone to the store, but I didn't want to. I needed room in the fridge for the Easter lunch anyway. To be honest I just plain forgot. So Ryan made his shake this morning with Whole Milk and then he emailed me just now and told me to email him a grocery list and he would go after work. Now, this is not the first time he has offered. But this is the most important one. The thought of going just makes me want to hurl. Love this man...he is a good one...

Tata,
Carrie

P.S. When Ryan was traveling the other week he had an interesting thing happen. It was a packed plane...no empty seats. So he had to choose a seat between two men...two priests! Man, wouldn't you think something is about to happen to you if that was you? I mean, was that a sign?!

Easter weekend!

Ryan was in a golf tournament so Hagen and I took the day on Saturday as a "let's go out with Papa and Pia day!" We went to Patrizio's and ate a very good lunch on the patio and then went shopping for big pants for Mama and then some decorations for my big room. So fun!!

Sunday was Easter. Hagen has been sweating it but went to bed knowing that he called the EB and told him not to come by so that was taken care of. He went to bed as usual and Ryan and I started hiding eggs and putting together his basket. It is so fun to live the holidays through your children's eyes...it takes you back to thinking how excited we were those nights!

We decided that we wouldn't put any eggs on the stairs or upstairs. When Hagen woke up we said the EB came BUT we left him a note saying that he can hide eggs downstairs but not to go upstairs...he bought it and had a blast finding eggs in the house!

At 10:30 Papa and Pia came over and we hid 1,000,000 eggs in the backyard for the big hunt. The rest of the crew (18 total) were there by 11:00. Hagen really got his feelings hurt. It was time for the big hunt, but the rule is you have to stay on the porch until everyone is outside. Noah is young and started to go out early so Hagen was following and someone told him it wasn't time yet. He got his feelings hurt because Noah got to go and he couldn't. It took him awhile to get over it and hunt for real. You can tell a difference between your kids crying on if it is being bratty or for real, you hurt my feelings...he was for real hurt. The thing is I didn't know why he was upset...it was only hours later when he was going big potty that we discussed his crying fit. He was whispering to me in the bathroom that he was sad....I asked him why and he whispered that Noah got eggs and Courtney told him no. I told him that if he is ever sad or gets his feelings hurt to talk to me or Daddy and that Courtney was following the rules and Noah was little and didn't know better. Poor baby...that must have felt so unfair.

So we had a great time and everyone was finally gone at 4:00...it was 5 hours of craziness and no naps. It was too late for a nap so we put Nemo on in our room and said he needed to rest and if he came out or was playing he would need to go lay down in his room. He didn't and stayed in our bed the whole time...eyes wide open...he doesn't fall asleep watching a show.

Candy is EVERYWHERE...EB, egg hunt, Aunt Karen's basket, Nana's basket...it is everywhere.

I will say that the day started off kinda sad. I was taking my wintery wreath down from the front door that I noticed yesterday had not been changed (it's not evergreen looking...just tons of red berries). I took it down and then kinda shook it to get any dirt/dust/leaves that had gotten on it during the winter off...then plop...a baby bird and part of a nest fell out on my porch! I put the wreath down, shut the door, and ran in to tell Ryan what happened!! He put on rubber gloves and put the birds (there were 2) back in the nest that was still firmly attached to the wreath and the nest stuffing and hung it back up. So we may have a winter wreath up for a few more weeks. They have some feathers and Ryan thinks it may be only a few more weeks and they will be off on their own. Poor babies...

I have no groceries in the house...I made ALL leftovers get out...I was completely disgusted in the ham I got for today and it was enough to feed an army of 100. It was smoked and not honey baked...and it was just nasty! I didn't even taste it...I ate everything else though!

Happy Easter all,

Carrie

GOOD Friday

Man, were we ever busy today! I had the day off of work and Ryan had to work. So it was just Hagen and I most of it. He had his egg hunt at school at 10:00 so we were going to drop in for that.

We got up and got ready like normal and left the house. Hagen was surprised when I pulled up to Sonic and ordered him a drink also...apple juice for the little darling and of course Iced Tea for the BIG lady. I realize I am pregnant, but I can not let go of my ice tea...I just can't...I've already given up recreational drugs and alcohol so I've done good.

We went to get gas, the bank, drop off movies, and then we went to Hagen's egg hunt! It lasted all of about 2 minutes. It was crazy and so cute! One little boy was talking around with a flimsy basket and dropping all of his eggs...another boy was just following him and picking up his loot and keeping for his own. Hagen made out good! I was cheering him on so that he can bring Mama some of the candy...

After that we headed out to the Mall...yep, it was time for a picture with the Easter Bunny! It was only 10:30 and the bunny arrives at 10:00 so it shouldn't be that long of a line right?! Wrong...there are other Moms that waited until the last minute also. It was OK...Hagen had time to observe the other tortures and come to grips that the EB really doesn't hurt anyone. He was big...he was brave. We walked up and I asked him if he wanted to sit in EB's lap or on the bench by him. He chose the bench, held EB's hand and SMILED! WOW! I was shocked. What a brave boy you are Hagen..way to go!

They of course had the EB by the petri dish play area. So we stopped there for about 10 minutes. I can't stand that place. I'm really not a germaphobe, but I just picture snot on all of it and gross diaper contents.....ewww!

We survived and went to Daddy's work to see some friends. After that Daddy took us on a date to eat pizza. When we dropped Daddy back off at work he took me out of my car seat and took me for a short walk to the pond to see the alligator! It is an iron sculpture that I ask daddy every night at dinner if he saw...he always sees it!!

We headed home and made a quick stop to get a haircut for Hagen...he looks so handsome. when we got home it was nap time and Hagen slept for 1 1/2 hours and woke up in a great mood!

It was such a nice day today. I'll be honest, his listening skills have been less than stellar lately. We have been very harsh with him and putting him in timeout after ONE warning...enough is enough H-man...It is Mama and Daddy against you and we will win sucka!!

Tata,
Carrie

P.S. Hagen's new phrase is "because that's how I roll..." He uses it in completely inappropriate situations...it is just what he says when he has nothing to say. Kinda cute...